he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
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