I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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