haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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