i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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