sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Randomize
