i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
