He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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