this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
no you cant smoke seaweed
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
