She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
