i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Michael Bay diarrhea
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
