just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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