yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
