I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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