Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize