that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
