I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
