she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
