Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
