atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
