Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
