I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Hello my rib-scented angel!
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
