ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
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