Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
