she smelled like a LAN party
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
