quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
