I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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