I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
