My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
