I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize