So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
