I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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