just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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