I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
