Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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