yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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