Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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