I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
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