I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
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