i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
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