I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
one might say we're banned from that church
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
