Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
