i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize