***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
