You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
