Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Randomize