her vagine was all disorganized.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point đź’ś
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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