I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
