is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Michael Bay diarrhea
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
