I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
And then he peed in my hair
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