yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
